Opposites Attract
Posted on Thursday, March 11th, 2010 at 12:06 am
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Matchmaker advice: do opposites attract, or repel?
We've all heard that old dating expression: "opposites attract". How true is it really though, and is the person you met through your matchmaker service really all that different, or do you simply have a different way of looking at life? Sometimes it seems that even though the person we like is our polar opposite, there is still something that attracts you to them, and many times this leads to a comfortable compatibility, despite of the differences. Sometimes however, this could result in endless arguments and differences of opinion.
How much do opposites really attract then, and when is it time to go your separate ways rather than try and hold out that things improve? Matchmaker experts share some tips on dealing with the opposites factor:
- Are the differences serious?
For instance, you may have very different views on religion, politics, family, lifestyle or other potentially hazardous issues – even if your matchmaker service ensures that you are as well-matched as possible, sometimes we don't put down how we really feel about things in our dating profile. You may not have thought much about your feelings on children, until you met someone who strongly feels that they do not want kids. Huge differences like that can be a challenge to deal with, especially if you both feel very passionately about issues. If you still have feelings for each other, and you are both prepared to accept your differences, then it is quite possible to live happily in spite of these differences.
- Are the differences more superficial?
So you like art house movies, and he thinks that they are pretentious. You prefer chilled cocktail bars, while he loves trance parties. Differences like these are almost unavoidable, and these are the differences that help us to step out of our comfort zones, say matchmaker experts. If you love him dearly, but really can't handle the fact that he enjoys cricket while you would rather watch paint dry, then learn how to compromise and find something that you both enjoy. If there isn't really anything, but you still get along, then learn to share your time between him and your interests.
- Is the root of your attraction because of your differences or in spite of them?
Let's be honest – sometimes we like the thrill of dating someone that is totally opposite to us. Perhaps he is someone we wish we could be more like, or maybe she makes you feel like there is more to life than the things you have always known. There is a certain thrill in dating someone different, but our motives for dating should never be about wanting to compensate in any way for something we feel we lack in life. Instead, you should be dating because of who the person is and how they make you feel. At the end of the day, time will tell if your relationship can withstand the differences, and real, honest relationship will always be able to weather the hiccups.
- Are the differences causing you to fight?
The ultimate test of whether opposites really do attract, and for good is how often you fight. If the differences are causing you to argue and get into constant debate that end in tears, then it is time to evaluate your relationship and decide if those opposites really are causing an issue, and if you are able to work through the difference or not. Matchmaker experts advise that opposites can easily attract, but should never affect your happiness at the end of the day.
About the Author
Bianca Jones knows that a good matchmaker agency holds the key for corporate dating.
Paula Abdul - Opposites Attract
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